No News/Extremely interesting news!

Hi, so sorry to leave you all hanging in suspense-but...sadly there is no news on the twins-our case worker has not heard anything from the social worker in Louisiana * sigh* but hopefully no news is good news!
Now here is the interesting news-we just found out this weekend-while we were away at Les's family reunion in Alberta-that we are expecting our third baby-due in February! WOW! It was a bit of a shock even though I had been suspicious for a couple of weeks. I am a little scared but i did some research and found that there are two midwife clinics in prince george so i am hoping for a natural vbac but we will see! anyway as you can see my computer is not working correctly tonight so i will post more details soon

They're girls!!!!

Well I finally got a hold of my worker today...the twins are identical girls YAYAYAYA!!!!! I was really hoping for girls, they are very healthy and beautiful she said ...their birthmom is creole/african american and the birth father is AA. They said the mom is one step away from being homeless, very financially unable to care for them anymore-how sad is that? She never did any drugs or alcohol during her pregnancy, the fees are actually lower than what we budgetted for PRAISIE GOD!! (we are a little short on the fees still but I am sure if this is for us God will provide) She is in New Orleans.
So she has profiles and she will be looking this weekend-they have an appointment to meet with her on Monday-hopfully she will have decided by then and we will know-even though I am confident that this is from God. So please pray for our family this weekend that our profile would be appealing, and that God would place us on her heart if that is His will.
I will keep you all posted as soon as I hear anything-blessings and have a great long weekend! (Sorry for my American readers-this weekend we celebrate Canada Day)

Hanging in the moment

Last night my husband and I were feeling a little down, we have some decisions to make and they were weighing heavily on our shoulders. We were stressed and frustrated. So we didn't do any of the bizillion things we needed to do...instead we sat here on my computer and looked up all our favorite songs and added them to my playlist-hint-the old country ones are his NOT mine lol! We played a song that we danced to at our wedding-Louisianna Saturday night, then we both said -I really wish our baby would come from Louisianna, *sigh* then we moved on to other songs. I crawled into bed and did my devotions around midnight and I was having one of those I don't want to do this HARD HARD waiting part surronding adoption anymore...I cried out to God please I am so weary of holding onto this dream, so dragged down by it always hanging over our heads...I just want to be home snuggling my little one and praising God. Then I gave everything over to Him and just said I can't do this anymore-please please take this burden off my shoulders. Part of my devotions had been about being still and focusing just on Him and at those moments you will hear His whisper. I fell asleep, being still, waiting on Him.

I recieved a phone call this morning just after eight from my adoption agency. They wanted to know if we would be willing to take 7 month old African American twins!
In Louisianna. They are showing the birthmom our profile today! I don't even know if they are boys/girls one of each...I am just so overwhelmed by God! All I could say to our worker was YES!!! YES PLEASE!
Now to add even more to this and God's impeccable timing...
Les works for the railroad and the end of May he was the train to back up into this siding that has a derail block at the end of it. It was a sixty car train instead of the usual 10-20 cars he was used to. Well he didn't stop it at exactly the right second and the very end car had one wheel go over the derail. Well this means everything stops and they get hauled in for drug testing etc.. He had a hearing a couple of weeks ago and he was cleared, he didn't get into any major trouble and we thought that was the end of it...well he found out last night that they suspended him for five days -this is normal for them to do-however the dates are unbelievable-he would have this Saturday to next Sunday off-SOOOO if this birthmom chooses us-he already has all next week off-we were worried about how he was going to get off work! Tell me our God is not AMAZING!!
So I guess we are back to having HOPE and FAITH that God will work all things together for the good.
Thank you Dad.

A Poem

The Waiting Child
by Debbie Bodie

I saw you meet your child today
You kissed your baby joyfully
And as you walked away with her
I played pretend you'd chosen me.
I'm happy for the baby, yet
Inside I"m aching miserably
I want to plead as you go by,
`Does no-one wanta child of three?"
I saw you meet your child today
In love with her before you met
And as I watched you take her out
I knew it wasn't my turn yet.
I recognize you from last year!
I knew I'd seen yourface before!
But you came for a second babe.
Does no-one wanta child of four?
I saw you meet your child today
But this time there was something new
A nurse came in and took MY hand
And then she gave my hand to you.
Can this be true?I'm almost six!
And there are infants here you see?
But then you kissed me and I knew
The child you chose this time was me.

I thought this was a very powerful poem and I wanted to share it with you...hope you enjoy and that it caused some thought provoking.

Seminars and soaps

We attended the mandatory seminar this past weekend in Prince George, it was lead by an older women who had adopted thirty years ago...needless to say-I was totally disgusted with the whole thing. When we did our seminar in Alberta two years ago-I came away so overwhelmed with information I couldn't think straight for weeks! This seminar sadly was lacking-it was lacking honesty about how difficult and trying the adoption process can be, as well as how difficult life with an adopted child can be. It was lacking information on the countries we are interested in adopting from, it was lacking updated info on attachment and the types of orphanges children could be coming from. The videos they showed were from the eighties (seriously!)
So anyways the point of this rant is that i was so sad and disgusted about how many people were going to go away from this seminar lacking the truth and knowledge about adoption that I have definatly decided that when we move (we will only be 45 min from PG) I am going to start an adoption agency-simaliar to Antioch Adoptions in Washinton State. They are run as a church ministry-providing FREE adoptions (you have to help with the fundraising). I know this will be extremely difficult to do right now but I am going to start the process and even if it takes a couple of years-this province will have an adoption agency that is closer to the North (a couple travelled 8 hours from Prince Rupert to come to this seminar-their is no agency up here so they put on a seminar so people wouldn't have to drive 18 hours to get to their main office in Victoria)
And that is Christian based with Christian values. I would appreciate your prayers concerning this decision and that God would guide the whole process. I have been thinking about doing this for some time now and this seminar was a turning point for me.

Now on to a totally different topic-I have been struggling recently with wanting to go natural in our home and yet not having all the knowledge and time to search out info on the web. However I found an amazing website that has many of the values I hold as well as some that I would like to adopt! www.thefamilyhomestead.com it is an amazing resource for us stay at home moms who are interested in the best for our families!
I have a white ceramic top stove here and I hate it! I have to use tons of chemical cleaner to get it clean and I have to scrub till I am ready to drop and it still does't look all that great-any little drop of water on it turns black and it is just really nasty-well I found an amazing new way to clean it-I tried it last night and WOW I was absolutly amazed! Take some baking soda-it is a mild abrasive and cut the end off a lemon -sprinkle some baking soda on the stove top and use the lemon with the cut end down and scrub away-squeeze the lemon now and then to release more juice and use the outer peel of the lemon to scrub-and it comes off amazingly! With half the amount of vigoress scrubbing with the chemical cleaner! who hoo! So I am sold on the natural way to clean things-I also found this website that has a lot of really awesome info as well http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Prairie/8088/clngrn.html check them out and tell me what you think and blessings as you enjoy your day!

Well I am back...sorry for the absence, our houseguest was a computer/phone hog while she was here and my laptop had to go in to see the doc. But we are back now! And the houseguest has gone. Her boyfriend showed up at three in the morning and took her home-home to no jobs, nowhere to live and abuse. But it wasn't up to us to make her stay...she knows she is welcome back here anytime she wants.
Anyways I now understand why there are so many teenage mothers out there dependant on welfare and why there are so few babies given up for adoption in Canada-after visiting two organizations in our local communities that offer support for crisis pregnancies and family issues it is abundantly apparent that adoption is not encouraged here. I was so ticked off mad when I came out of those places I could hardly think straight-I was looked at as though I had horns growing out of my head when I asked if they counsel expectant moms about adoption? Their answers were to tell me that they provide free food/clothing/ food stamps/ baby clothing and other paraphenilia to help these young mothers. I said wow thats great but do you counsel at all about adoption being a viable option-NO.
I was so upset and angry-so their solution to the fact that some (not all) of these girls are under 18, have no jobs, no where to live and no one to support them and you don't even broach the subject of "what are you going to do, how are you going to support this baby finacially let alone emotionally?"
Nope.
They just give them free stuff and make it seem like its ok for them to be 16 with no way to support themselves or their babies, who later on end up in foster care and then possibly in our prison system.
Like I said I was so mad when I walked out of there. The girl who was staying here thinks her baby is like a puppy, oh cute and cuddly and look at all the attention I am going to get etc... Nobody is willing to broach the subject with her-including her family, and Les and I were going to do it after she settled in a little-but she didn't stay long enough.
Meanwhile there are four thousand couples waiting to adopt a newborn in the province of British Columbia-only approximatly forty babies are placed per year.
SAD.
They don't even advertise adoption agencies or adoption as an option here. I have noticed because we are adopting from the US that in that country they advertise-online, adoptive families can do classified ads down there-but up here-nope adoption is only an option if they ask about it. Don't get me wrong the adoption agencys advertise-but their advertisements are directed at adoptive couples -not at the birthparents. *sigh* grrr.
Anyways that has been my mind frame this week, hopefully it will get better lol!
I am proud to report that I finished my very first real quilt lastnight-a full size with backing and everything -I have done tons of rag quilts and a few wall hangings but not a full size quilt. Now I have and I am so super proud of myself. I I can ever figure out how to post pictures I will show you!
Anyways, thanks to everyone who was praying for the young lady who was staying here, and for our family-I appreciate it so much! I am off to do some more painting-a bathroom and some old window frames I am going to use to display some scrapbooking! Blessings!

Please Keep praying!

Thank you all for your comments and your prayers. I only have a sec for a quick update-things are going well, but I don't know if she is going to stay with us-her boyfriend is in Alberta and she wants to be with him...and he doesn't want to come here yet. So we are not sure if she will stay-we really hope so but-its up to her. We think it would be best if she stayed and had some time to think through her options and her future, but I also remember being that age and wanting nothing more than to cuddle with my guy. Les and I dated when we were fourteen and then again at eighteen and we have been together ever since. And I remember those first feelings-like you can't bear to be apart or not talk to eachother all day...so that is what she is experiencing right now. But I don't think she is thinking as far into the future as she should be-like neither of them have a job right now, or a place to live together(she is welcome here as long as she needs but not the two together-we do have small children and we disagree with that lifestyle choice) I don't think they have thought through what it will be like to provide for a baby-the costs associated with babies and the responsibilities involved. Like the fact that it is way harder to finish school and your life is very limited in a lot of ways (which is hard even for those of us who have deliberatly made the choice to have children) and she is only sixteen-I keep wondering if this is what she really wants out of her life-I know for myself if I was pregnant at 16 nobody would have been able to drag my baby from me-I have always desired to be a mom it was my lifes goal. But if she wants other things -well I just hope that she doesn't make a decision based on the attention she thinks she will get. hmm ok well thats enough of my opinions for now. We are trying to just love her and help her know all her options. We are going in for a job interview tommorow, and then I will be taking her to the pregnancy outreach centre in Williams Lake-they offer counseling and prenatal info etc..so that is our plans so far. I would really appreciate your continuing prayers for the young lady and her baby, as well as for my husband, children and I that we would be a light, a comfort and above all a beacon of Gods love. Thank you.
p.s I am sorry I won't be able to comment on your blogs for awhile-I have been sneaking in a few peaks when I get the chance, but I just don't have the energy to comment at the moment-hope you are all doing well, blessings
Erin

Desperatly needing prayer coverage!

Well life is never dull-I recieved a phone call today from a young lady from our old town, whom we have been chatting back and forth with for a couple of months, she has recently gone through some major crisis and we had offered for her to come stay with us if she needed to. Well she is coming. Tonight! I am driving to a town about two hours away to pick her up. She is 16 and 6 weeks pregnant. She has some major issues that she needs help dealing with and she really needs people who love her to support her. I have known her since she was about 5 years old. I babysat her and her sisters often. I love them all dearly and have hurt for them all for a number of years but have been unable to help. Now I am able and we feel God has made a way for us to help. However we really need your prayer support as we bring this hurting girl into our home. Please pray for protection for my family, and that Les and I would be able to minister to her in what ever way she needs it.
Thank you so much! I don't know how much more I will be able to say-this is her private business but please know that I appreciate all your prayers.
Thank you
Erin

The Shack

Well I was in the bookstore the other day and saw the book-The Shack. I have heard lots of people say it is an amazing book etc...so I thought well I will give it a try and see what I think-wow. My life is changed to put it simply. I have never read such a profoundly moving book in my whole life other than my bible. I would recommend everyone who reads to read this book! It will literally change your life! Kim I have a copy and you are so going to borrow it! You too Justine if you haven't read it already! I am serious-if you have thought about getting it-go buy it! It is worth every penny!
Ok now that I have pushed the most amazing book on you I will tell you about some info I found out about the other day-remember our little caucasian birthmom-well she had to pick another family for her baby and guess what-she picked a family that had been waiting for three years to be chosen!!!! Can you believe it-this was exactly why we didn't want to say yes to a white baby-because we didn't want to take away from somebody who had been waiting years!!! This news was such an answer to prayer for me and it really confirmed that we made the right decision! Praise my Lord!! He is truly good!

In other news-we are moving -again-*sigh* I knew this was going to happen I just didn't think so soon. We found our ranch. Finally a place with 527 acres deeded and 700 and some acres ag lease. All in our price range. Only problem is that is two hours north of here. So all the time and effort we have invested in making friends and living in this community...well hopefully they will come visit us at the new place! I guess I shouldn't get to ahead of myself, we haven't sold here yet or made an offer up there yet-but you know when you just know you have found the right place-well this is it. I don't totally love the house but I can live with it. For a little while. So if you would like to have a look here it is http://www.ranchesonly.com/listing.php?Listing_ID=126
Tell me what you think! I just hope that I can get wireless up there-cause I don't think I could do dial up again! lol! I have been spoiled!
Anyway I guess that is all in the continuing saga of our lives-blessings and go buy that book!
Erin

Joyfully waiting

I guess the agency made a mistake-they are not Hague approved-just in the process of becoming approved-it doesn't count for us *sigh*. Today I found another set of bi-racial twins due in June but that agency isn't even trying to be Hague approved. Then tonight on the tv we are disconnecting tommorow-a show all about identical twins. I am feeling bombarded by twins! I don't know if it is just coincedence or if God is up to something...but I still really want twins! Is that bad do you think? I mean I would be totally thrilled with just one baby-trust me THRILLED! But I have this little thing in my heart that just won't go away and its this strong want for twins grrr. So I am praying that if this little desire is placed here by God that He would fulfill that desire. If its not-that it would go away!
Anyways -I phoned a spoke with Tina at ABL, she said that there are two birthmoms still looking at our profiles and that they have 12 new birthmoms they are in the process of working with this week-so hopefully it will be our turn again soon! My devotions last night were all about patiently waiting for God to fufill His promises and how He doesn't tell us when He's going to because we might give up before it ever happens. It was such a reminder to me that He is in control and Has our best interests at heart. Thats what I love about God-He KNOWS. I personally hate not knowing things-it drives me nuts! But I get this big dose of comfort knowing that God knows! He knows what is going to happen, He knows what it feels like, and He knows us-what our hearts desires are, how much we can take/can't take.
So here I am once again waiting and trusting that God knows where this adoption is going-who our baby(s) will be, and when they will get here. In the mean time I am busy sewing up a storm, getting caught up on scapbooking, planting my flower beds and playing with my beautiful girls. Life really can be good-even when you are waiting!

OMGosh!!!!

I just found out about a set of biraical twin girls due Aug 15!!! AHHH!!! Ok-I know the agency can work with Canadians-yay! The birth parents are open to any race, religion and amount of children! I am just waiting to hear if there are any other loopholes -but it sounds like we can be presented to this couple YIPPEE!! (for those of you that don't know-I have been praying and hoping for twins-especially girls!)
Now the only problem with this situation is that the fees are 34,000$ OUCH...I do not have that much money-however I do firmly believe that if this is the situation God has for us-He will provide-so I was hoping all of you out there in bloggerland that pray-would please lift this situation up to our Lord in prayer-I would really appreciate it! Thank you!
I will know way more details tommorow-so hopefully you will hear from me again soon
Goodnight dear friends!

SUMMER!!!

Ok -this has been the longest winter I can remember in years-and it is finally over and summer is here!!It is like 28 C here and I am now going to turn off my computer and go outside and run through the sprinklers with my girls and then I am going to plant my sweet peas and then we are going to have a marshmallow roast and watch the sun set on the lake...ahhhh I remember now why we bought this place! The lake is soo beautiful in the summer! What is it about water that calms the soul? Anyways-heres hoping you all have a wonderful May long weekend and that you don't get too sunburned lol!
Blessings

Decision made

Well we phoned and unmatched with our birthmom. Its done. You know, I have this strange sort of peace about it-I guess it just wasn't the baby for us. It still hard to think about that little birthmom, but you know its even harder to think about those three birthmoms who have nobody wanting their babies. Now they do. And I feel alot more peace about it. So here we are starting all over again with the waiting! I am so excited to see who God brings our way-He knows our hearts desires and we know he loves us and wants the best for us-so I think we will have an amazing story to share someday about our new baby. Thanks for all the prayers and we would appreciate you praying for the white birthmom-that she would find the family that was meant for that little one. Thank you. Blessings, Erin

STRESS

Well after an insane week of dealing with losing a friend that I didn't always get along with, and a whole wack of adoption nonsense-I am exhausted and stressed beyond anything I have felt before. I have lots to update you on. Where to start is the trouble.
We are unmatching with our birthmom. wow. I can't believe we are doing it but we are-here is the story-I got a phone call last night from a lady here in BC who has adopted two AA girls from the US, and is working on her third. She also is working with Choices our BC agency (grrr more about them later) She said that she was talking with Jeanna -the coordinator we were hoping to use in SC, Jeanna gave her my phone # and we chatted for two and half hours lastnight. She told me about a situation in Indianna of a birthmom who is desperatly trying to find a family for her baby due in July. She had chosen two families but one backed out because of a family emergency and the other she found out was just matched. We started talking about this and realized that it was probably my agency ABL because that is who Jeanna works with and that maybe it was us she chose because we had just been matched. So this morning I spoke with Jeanna-yes it is ABL our agency and they have two AA birthmoms with no families stepping up to be presented to them. wow again. So Jeanna phoned and talked to Laronda who is taking over for Tina my worker this week while she is away. Laronda phoned me and we had a really long chat and basically this is what is happening-ABL made the mistake by sending our profile to a CC birthmom and they have 15 other families waiting for a white baby. Remember-no families waiting for the two AA babies. SO she said that it was our decision either way and that they would support us whatever we decided. I told her how Les and I feel and where we were coming from-why we specified AA and not CC but how we would have been willing to take a CC baby if that is what God asked us to do. She also went on to say that the birthmom we are matched with is showing signs of possibly changing her mind. Then she told me that Joan from Choices had spoken with her this morning to say that we can't take this baby because they haven't signed off on our homestudy that they have had since Feb. Why? Because we haven't taken the education seminar which is mandatory in BC. Hmmm they told me that we didnt have to go to a seminar that we could do it by correspondense and I had spoken with three different people there in the last two week and they all told me that we were good to go-everything was done and our file wasn't missing anything. GGRRRRRRRR!! So this is the third time they have lied to me. So the next seminar is June 14th-the CC baby is due June 6th-we can't leave the country with the baby unless ABL has the signed copy of our homestudy. Choices won't sign and send it until we have done the education part. So basically we can't take this baby. And we feel that this is a sign from God to pursue the other babies -they are due in July-our homestudy would be signed etc...
Now if you have not been following my blog I am going to repost an old post about a devotion I read when I was struggling to make a decision and I want you to think about what it says and how it can apply to this decision

"Consider what God has done; Who can straighten what He has made crooked?" Eccl. 7:13

God often seems to place His children in places of deep difficultty, leading them into a corner from which there is no escape. He creates situations that human judgement, even if consulted, would never allow. Yet the cloudniness of the circumstance itself is used by Him to guide us to the other side. Perhaps this is where you find yourself even now. You situation is filled with uncertainty and is very serious, but it is perfectly right. The reason behind it will more than justify Him who brought you here, for it is a platform from which God wil display His almighty grace and power. He not only will deliver you but in doing so will impart a lesson that you will never forget. And in days to come, you will return to the truth of it with singing. You will be unable to thank God enough for doing exaclty what He has done.

Wow, seems to me that most people would think we were crazy for turning down a situation-maybe we are, but maybe it was a test to see if we would stand up for what we believe in and to stand by the commitments and decisions we had made(only taking an AA/biracial baby)
Either way we have prayed about it and thought about it all night and all day today and we feel that we are meant to make ourselves available to the AA birthmoms. Please pray for us that God would send His conformation and we would know that we were doing His will-because ultimatly it doesn't matter what color of skin, what gender or where God sends us a baby from-so long as we are doing what He wants thats all that matters to me.
So I need to let ABL know by tommorow what we decided. This has got to be one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make-so many lives will be affected by our choice. It is a huge burden. I feel so torn, yet I know where my heart is-even if it means waiting longer. And yet I still feel for our birthmom-how sad to pick a family and then have them say they don't want your baby. I guess its not going to come accross like that-they will say its because of our agency. But still I feel really awful. At the same time it never felt right which is why I never sent our match agreement and money yet. sigh. I don't want this responsibility.

Anyways. Life is insanly busy trying to talk to all these agencies and figure out what is going on, as well as raise my family and get my husband to his job, pick up the cats from the vet(ouch that bill hurt!) I went to a young moms group at a church inWilliams Lake that we tried out a couple of weeks ago-Les's boss is in Williams Lake and has shown some interest in God so we thought we should try out a few churches there in case he wants to go, we could have a place to recommend him too and take him to if he wanted. The moms group was great! 15 moms with younger children and sooo friendly! I am definatly going back again!
Tommorow night I have a princess house show-my home based business that is sometimes more trouble than its worth! lol!
Anyways thats all I guess-I am weary and am going to bed!
Blessings

Tragedy

Hello dear friends. Today I recieved some very devestating news-a friend from bible college-Mandy, was killed yesteday riding her bike home from her teaching job in Chicago. Her boyfriend was planning a surprise proposal this week, he flew her dad in from Romania and had organised her whole family to be there. I can't even imagine the grief of her family and her would be fiance. Please pray for the Annis family this week as they mourn their 25 year old daughter.

WE GOT THE CALL!!!!!!!

Hi everyone-we got the call from our agency! We have been chosen and matched with a birthmother this morning!!!PRAISE GOD!!!!
I will start from the begining. This weekend I was at a local craft show selling my quilts, my mom came up from four hours away and watched the girls for me. Then her and Les and the girls headed to their house for the weekend to help my dad with the cows. I came out later that night after I was done at the craft show, so I had plenty of time in the vehicle by myself (it was pure pleasure who knew silence could be sooo wonderful!) Anyways I was praying which I often do while driving and I started to cry and poured out my heart to God asking for Him to please let it be my turn to get the call. This was Saturday. Sunday night I had a dream that our agency phoned while we were staying at my folks, to say we had been chosen and that it was twins (this is of course what we have been praying for!) I couldn't get back to sleep after that and I kept praying this morning that God would let it be true! After lunch I phoned home to check our messages hoping that there would be an important call. I have done this for the last three months everytime we go stay at my parents. I even changed our answering message to include my parents phone number-just in case!! Well I get to the third message and it is Tina at our agency-she said she wanted me to call her back and gave me her cell number. hmmm I thought it is probably just to say she got our new profiles in the mail today. If it was important she would have called mom and dads. So I hit repeat to hear it again so I could write down the number. Then mom and dads phone beaped to say there was a call on the other line. So I quickly answered it and it was __TINA! She called to say we have been chosed my a birthmom in Indianna!!!!! I was sooooooooo excited I could hardly talk and I was trying sooo hard not to cry!
So this is the info that we have-birthmom 20 years old, due June 6th, lives with her mom and grandma who are supportive of her decision, birthfather not in the picture. She was looking for something different in a family and because we are Canadian she chose us! We were her first pick and she thinks we are adorable! So WOW!
Now here is a little bit of a weird twist for you. When we filled out our application for our agency we ticked little boxes of what race we would be willing to accept. We checked all the boxes for every mixed race and all AA. We decided to adopt from the US because we could adopt a newborn and because we felt that maybe the AA babies were not as wanted as some Caucasian babies. This info has come from numerous agencies and other people we trust...so why would we sit here on a wait list in Canada for a baby for ten years when it appeared to us that there were more babies available and we could help someone who might not be wanted. We were under the impression that there are more white families adopting than AA and that they are not always prepared to adopt transracially. So we understood it that there are lots of AA babies available and the fees are considerably less in some cases. For the most part this is true, there are however exceptions as well. Ok so here is the thing-we never checked the Caucasion box but guess what-our baby is supposedly Caucasion!
At first I was a little disappointed I think-not a lot mind you I am definatly THRILLED to be chosen, but you know when you expect something and then it doesn't happen it can be a little disapointing! But I have been praying about it all day and this is my conclusion-God obviously has a very important reason for us to be adopting a white baby instead. We never checked the box so techincally we shouldn't have even been shown to this birthmom. But we were. And she chose us. Hmmmm seems to me God can make a way for His plans even when it seems impossible. So I am completly shocked at the news today and it still hasn't soaked in completly-but know this-our baby is going to be born in five and a half weeks and I want to be the first to hold him/her!!! I never got to hold either of our girls for over an hour after they were born becuase of emergency c-sections-this baby (if possible) I get to hold first!! And I will not be nearly unconsious, nor puking, nor so weak I can't even hold my own head up-I will be standing there fully alert praising God every second for the precious gift He has given me!!! YAYAYAY
I am going to be a mom again!!!!

A few thoughts

Good morning everyone. This morning I have been up since just before six-I cleaned up puppy poo twice in the middle of the night-after I stepped in it of course. Then this morning I have cleaned up four more piles of do do. grrrr. Just having one of those mornings.
Now however there is good news, I am done painting!!! HURRAY!! My living room is done and it looks great, my kitchen/dining room too! Now all that is left are the two bathrooms which we are going to be putting cape cod style wainscotting up in to go with my house on the lake theme! So I actually feel like I am getting some where! The laundry is still piling up however as are the dishes-it is quite difficult to paint and rearrange furniture and keep up with the housework all with two kids and a puppy around !!
Ok I am done bragging about my accomplishments now and done whining and hoping for your sympathy lol.
On to adoption news. This week has been a rollercoster. We heard about a situation with an eight month old little AA girl and we phoned to find out if the agency was Hague approved. They didn't get back to us until yesterday-Yes the agency can work with us-but they matched the baby that morning. sniff, sniff. They even had a picture of her and she was just beautiful and she stole my heart and what can I say I really really wanted her! It is getting so hard to wait! And like I said this rollercoster ride is driving me mad!!
Now today I found out about another situation-a two month old AA boy in FL. So now I am once again waiting to find out if the agency is Hague approved or not. *sigh* So I guess I will keep you posted. Please pray for me I am struggling with this waiting on God thing!
I guess that is all for now. I could ramble on some more about inconsequential things but who really wants to know! So hope you all have a great day!

Letting go

Hello everyone-I have returned from my vacation and feel refreshed and ready to start new. I am glad I stayed in Alberta for two weeks instead of just one-because the first week I was soo homesick for my old way of life and friends and church family but by the end of the second I was anxious to get home and shake things up-so I decided since no one scrapbooks here-I am going to start a scrapbooking night-which I have already set up! Hurray! I have tackled my house work with renewed vigor I have even painted over the hideous pumpkin orange that my husband painted my dining room! (He was going for a burnt orange but he is kind of color blind!)
We even have a new addition to our family- an adorable puppy named Chap-I picked him-my very first dog!
I decided that our adoption will happen in God's time and I can no longer put my life on hold waiting for that phone call. I found out while in Alberta that the birthmom with four gave up just the twin girls-to another family. I was so heart broken but I thinkI am to the point now of just hoping God has an amazing situation for us-better that I could have hoped or dreamed. So right now I am just letting go of my anxiety, my ideas of where this adoption should go and enjoying my very blessed life!
Congrats to Justine on her referral! Praise God for His blessings! And to Courtney and Stephanie on their adoptions as well! Thinking of you all and praying for you as you face this world as aliens!

A little vacation

Hey everyone-guess where I am!!! Sorry -not picking up my baby- just visiting in Alberta! I am staying at a dear friends house and am enjoying seeing all my old friends. Life is still stressful and full of excitement. We found out on Friday that we are still able to work with our coordinator Jeanna. But then today we found out after calling and talking with ABL that it might not work out as well as we had assumed. Abl also said that they had 8 new birthmoms contract with them this week sooo....I was told they think we will be placed ASAP. Now I am not sure what we are doing! Anyway just wanted to give you a brief update and please ask for your prayers that we would know what situation is the one God has for us. And for me to have patience and no stress well dealing with the rest of this adoption paperwork/phoning all from another province! AAHHH!. I am not sure how long I will be here-yes Claire I am coming back I promise-however it is getting very hard not to be homesick-we went to church here yesterday morning and it was like a big family reunion-it was so amazing to see so many familiar faces and to be greeted and mauled over by all the people we hold dear. I keep asking myself why did we move again! It seems I can't remember all the reasons anymore. sigh. Oh well I am going to enjoy myself immensely while here-we are going to the water park in West Ed mall this weekend with a whole big group of friends and their kids. We are going to my grandmas 95 birthday party which will be a whole family reunion! Yippee! We have already been out for supper with friends, out for breakfast and out for lunch with different friends. Les had to head back today for work tommrow, but thats ok-I can get way more girlie movies in and giggling fits in while he is gone lol! Anyways-I will keep you all posted in case we get the call lol! Hope you are all doing great and I will catch up again later! Bye from Alberta
Erin

hmmmmm

Well what to write is the question of the day. I could start off by telling you that we are still waiting for our homestudy to get sent back to us to sign...I phoned Choices today and dug around trying to find out what was happening-apparently it has been sitting on a desk collecting dusk waiting to get sent back to us to sign. GRRRRRRRR double GRRRRRRRRR, however it appears that this has not affected our status with our US agency-in fact I got a call from Loisianna today my heart of course skipped a few beats when I saw the number but alas it was just one of the agencies customer service girls checking in to see how we were and to make sure we didn't have any problems with our social worker. That was very kind of her but I was really hoping it was to say come get your baby.
In other news one of my closest friends is currently in Mexico on her very first missions trip-I am sooo envious, so I was hoping you could join me in praying for her. She has some health issues and was in charge of a group of girls one of whom has some major issues happening in her life. Please pray that she would have courage to share her faith, that she would be given the amazing gift of tongues in Spanish so she can communicate effectively! And pray that God would bring the man of her dreams into her life-because this is what her hearts desire is. Thank you so much.
I probably won't post on here again till next week, I am heading to my folks for Easter weekend and am totally excited because a new dear friend who also just moved here is coming with us! So we are going to do some sleigh riding or horseback riding, feed some chickens, bottle feed a new little calf that lost its mom and go shopping in Vernon and possibly Kelowna ( I found a store there that sells Ergo baby carriers and I want one! that and they have a baby gap there!) Yippee!
So I hope that you all have an amazing weekend and that your remember what makes Easter so special, who we are celebrating-our lord and saviour Jesus Christ who sacrificially gave His life for us that we might live! Thank you Lord for the gift of your love!
Happy Easter

A little paint, and a big mess

Well, it has been a long while since I have posted, however I do have a very good excuse-in fact several! First Les and I finally got around to painting our bedroom-however the day after we had the whole room cleared out and the walls washed and the primer on-we all fell ill to the stomach flu and proceeded to stay in bed (well at least Les got to) or lay around on the couch and have all orfices of your body tormented by small sharp fingers (hmmm I wonder who had that pleasure!) So needless to say-what should have been a two day stint turned into a week long hassle-we finally moved back into our bedroom last night-and ohhhh what a night it was ahhhmmm....hey before you start thinking x rated let me remind you that we were puking for three days!!! I was meaning we got to sleep in our ever so soft KING size bed (a very very wonderful Christmas present!) with clean sheets and duvet and loads of room to wiggle and get comfortable (in case I haven't mentioned it before-Les kicks like a mule and roles over and beats me up in his sleep!) Ohh how wonderful-and then to top it off -no more hideous green walls-instead lovely beige and chocolate brown! Oh I really do love my new bedroom!
Anyways...so after all this you of course realize that the rest of the house was completly trashed-oh wait-it still kind of is!! AAAAAAHHHHH! So tommorows job is cleaning up, because guess what??? We are going to paint the rest of the house!-ok well we have already painted the spare room-oh wait that was me! And now our room is done, so we have hallway, livingroom, diningroom and two bathrooms! I mean really that should only take us hmmmlets see-a month or two! lol well you get my drift, we have been very busy and I am sorry to not keep you posted. I had the immense pleasure of seeing the Watoto childrens choir perform on Tuesday-they are from a Ugandan childrens home and they were amazing-I cried through the first bit -not because it was sad but just to see God at work in such a tangible way. Those children touched my heart and reminded me that God has bigger things for my life someday. For those of you who don't know-I attended Moody Bible Institute for a year because I wanted to be a missionar-and I still do. However I see myself working in an orphange or childrens home instead of teaching school.
But we will see-you never know where or when God's going to change your plans! I will be posting some pictures of the choir as soon as Justine send them to me! hint hint!
I will also post some pics of my bedroom before and after-as soon as I get them developed.
Nothing new happening adoption wise-God has been really blessing me with peace and encouragement-I really want to recommend an amazing devotional-Streams in the Desert by L.B Cowman wow it has been hitting me right where I need it the most and opening my eyes to seeing my Lord in everything.
Well I think that is all tonight, blessings to you all!
In Him
Erin

Sweet Hope

Lastnight I read the following devotion and it was as though the author was speaking to me. And I believe theAuthor of my life was. Here it is:

"Consider what God has done; Who can straighten what He has made crooked?" Eccl. 7:13

God often seems to place His children in places of deep difficultty, leading them into a corner from which there is no escape. He creates situations that human judgement, even if consulted, would never allow. Yet the cloudniness of the circumstance itself is used by Him to guide us to the other side. Perhaps this is where you find yourself even now.
You situation is filled with uncertainty and is very serious, but it is perfectly right. The reason behind it will more than justify Him who brought you here, for it is a platform from which God wil display His almighty grace and power. He not only will deliver you but in doing so will impart a lesson that you will never forget. And in days to come, you will return to the truth of it with singing. You will be unable to thank God enough for doing exaclty what He has done.

A salute to Canada

Hi everyone-my mom sent me this article and I wanted to share it with you-I know I am adopting from the US and I am very thankful for that, I also know some of my readers are American-please note-this is not a slander or a jab at anyone it particular, it is just something I support and feel shows a part of the true nature of my country-I hope you can all understand that I feel proud to be Canadian.

Sunday Telegraph Article from today's UK wires: Salute to abrave and modest nation - Kevin Myers, The Sunday Telegraph LONDON

Until the deaths of Canadian soldiers killed in Afghanistan,probably almost no one outside their home country had been aware thatCanadian troops are deployed in the region. And as always, Canada will buryits dead, just as the rest of the world, as always, will forget itssacrifice, just as it always nearly everything Canada ever does. It seemsthat Canada's historic mission is to come to the selfless aid both of itsfriends and of complete strangers, and then, once the crisis is over, to bewell and truly ignored. Canada is the perpetual wallflower that stands onthe edge of the hall, waiting for someone to come and ask her for a dance. Afire breaks out, she risks life and limb to rescue her fellow dance-goers,and suffers serious injuries. But when the hall is repaired and thedancing resumes, there is Canada, the wallflower still, while those she oncehelped glamorously cavort across the floor, blithely neglecting her yetagain. That is the price Canada pays for sharing the North Americancontinent with the United States, and for being a selfless friend of Britainin two global conflicts. For much of the 20th century, Canada was torn intwo different directions... it seemed to be a part of the old world, yet hadan address in the new one, and that divided identity ensured that it neverfully got the gratitude it deserved. Yet its purely voluntary contributionto the cause of freedom in two world wars was perhaps the greatest of anydemocracy. Almost 10% of Canada's entire population of seven millionpeople served in the armed forces during the First World War, and nearly60,000 died. The great Allied victories of 1918 were spearheaded by Canadiantroops, perhaps the most capable soldiers in the entire British order ofbattle. Canada was repaid for its enormous sacrifice by downright neglect,its unique contribution to victory being absorbed into the popular memory assomehow or other the work of the 'British'. The Second World War provided are-run. The Canadian navy began the war with a half dozen vessels, and endedup policing nearly half of the Atlantic against U-boat attacks. More than120 Canadian warships participated in the Normandy landings, during which15,000 Canadian soldiers went ashore on D-Day alone. Canada finished the warwith the third largest navy and the fourth largest air force in the world. The world thanked Canada with the same sublime indifferenceas it had the previous time. Canadian participation in the war wasacknowledged in film only if it was necessary to give an American actor apart in a campaign in which the United States had clearly notparticipated... a touching scrupulousness which, of course, Hollywood hassince abandoned, as it has no notion of a separate Canadian identity. So itis a general rule that actors and filmmakers arriving in Hollywood keeptheir nationality... unless, that is, they are Canadian. Thus Mary Pickford,Walter Huston, Donald Sutherland, Michael J. Fox, William Shatner, NormanJewison, David Cronenberg, Alex Trebek, Art Linkletter and Dan Aykroyd have,in the popular perception, become American, and Christopher Plummer,British. It is as if, in the very act of becoming famous a Canadian ceasesto be Canadian, unless she is Margaret Atwood, who is as unshakably Canadianas a moose, or Celine Dion, for whom Canada has proved quite unable to findany takers. Moreover, Canada is every bit as querulously alert to theachievements of its sons and daughters as the rest of the world iscompletely unaware of them. The Canadians proudly say of themselves, and areunheard by anyone else, that 1% of the world's population has provided 10%of the world's peacekeeping forces. Canadian soldiers in the past halfcentury have been the greatest peacekeepers on Earth...in 39 missions on UNmandates, and six onnon-UNpeacekeeping duties, from Vietnam to East Timor, from Sinai to Bosnia.Yet the only foreign engagement that has entered the popular on Canadianimagination was the sorry affair in Somalia, in which out-of-controlparatroopers murdered two Somaliinfiltrators. Their regiment was then disbanded in disgrace,a uniquely Canadian act of self-abasement for which, naturally, theCanadians received no international credit. So who today in the United States knows about the stoic andselfless friendship its northern neighbour has given it in Afghanistan?Rather like Cyrano de Bergerac, Canada repeatedly does honourable things forhonourable motives, but instead of being thanked for it, it remainssomething of a figure of fun. It is the Canadian way, for which Canadiansshould be proud, yet such honour comes at a high cost. This past year moregrieving Canadian families knew that cost all too tragically well.

Quilt raffle fundraiser

Hi everyone, did I happen to mention how much I love love love wirless!! ok anyway yesterday I had the er pleasure (torture) of sitting in the foyer at Save-On for eight hours selling raffle tickets for our quilt raffle(a fundraiser for our adoption) After eight hours of freezing to death I came home with about 100$ then I had to pay the babysitter we really didn't need because Les never got called to work...grrrr! If I hadn't arranged for a sitter though-he would have got called!

Last night Hailey was up all night with a high fever and gross gunk coming out of her eyes-I think I will have to take her in today for some medicine or else phone my homeopath. She hasn't gotten an ear infection since we gave her the remedy from the homeopath-before she was getting about three a month since she was a week old-poor baby!

Today I got an email from dear friends of ours who are missionaries in Kenya-we hadn't heard from them how they were since before the riots started-we were getting quite concerned about them-but their email today said they were evacuated out of the area and are working on a building project in another area-praise the Lord!

I guess that is all-I forgot how hard this waiting part really is-when everything is said and done and you are literally just waiting for that call *sigh* lol oh well I have lots to keep working on here-my friend and I have gone into the quilt making business and so soon I will be posting some pictures!
Thats all for today-blessings!

Congrats Ian and Corrine!

This week we found out some amazing news-friends of ours in Alberta left on Monday for Haiti to go pick up their three beautiful children! Here is a video of their journey with more to come-I cried my eyes out over this one! Just a little bit of hope for those of us still waiting! Ian and Corrine have been waiting for over two and a half years for their kids to come home-please join with me in praising God for this adoption miracle-blessings Gates family!

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